Is it better to travel alone or with others?

The ultimate travel dilemma is whether you want to do it solo or in a group. Is one superior over the other?

I typically travel alone, but I’ve organized successful trips with friends before. (I’m not counting trips with my family.) The vibe between each of them are very different.

Keep in mind: this is just my opinion. This article is only one perspective out of many. You should read other articles to make an informed decision about what suits you better.

Solo travel

If you’ve decided to solo travel, it does not mean you are a loner. It does not mean you do not have friends. It means you want to enjoy the freedom and flexibility of going wherever you want, whenever you want. It means you want to focus on the experience of the place you’re visiting and soak in the culture, rather than the familiar people whom you already know so well.

Pros of solo travel

• As stated above, it gives you the time to immerse yourself in the destination and explore it deeply.
• If you want to socialize, you can still meet locals or fellow tourists. Assuming you are not reading a translated version of this article, you probably speak English, which means you can talk to the most number of people when you visit different places! Hooray!
• It gives you time away from other people, so you can find inner solace.

Cons of solo travel

• You have to manage all of the logistics yourself. It can get extremely tiring planning everything out.
• You might get lonely, especially if your trip exceeds two weeks.
• You can’t split a hotel room, so lodging costs go up compared to sharing a room with somebody.
• If you become sick, you have to take care of yourself.

Is solo travel worth it?

It depends on several factors. These range from your personal tastes of what you’re looking to do, to your ability to manage being alone, to where you visit.

Do you have a particularly strong desire to do niche things or go to niche places? If so, it can be very worth it to have full control over what you do.

Have trouble sticking to a schedule when traveling? The last thing you want to be bound to is your friends or a tour group. All other things disregarded, this is a situation where it’s probably better to go on your own.

If you can’t stand being alone for an extended period of time, either limit your solo travels to under 2 weeks or consider avoiding solo travel entirely. Loneliness while solo traveling is a very real concern. I was trying out the digital nomad lifestyle at the beginning of 2022 and I didn’t realize how big of a problem loneliness would become for me. (I’ll share my thoughts on being a digital nomad in a future article.)

Some places are suited to solo traveling, while others might be better off undertaken with a group of friends. Keep reading for more info on this.

What’s the best way to become a good solo traveler?

If you are new to solo travel, start with a place closer to where you live. Stay within the borders of your country, or if you live in a free movement zone like the Schengen Area, stay within that. That way, you are more familiar with the things you typically overlook, like the currency you use, the need (or rather, the lack of the need) to cross a country border with a passport, access to medical care covered by your insurance, the language you speak, local laws and customs, etc.

For Americans, I recommend traveling to New York City (unless you already live there, in which case I recommend Los Angeles, I guess). If you insist on going to a foreign country, try Canada (except Québec) rather than Mexico, because the language, laws, and customs will be the most similar to the U.S. If you speak some Spanish, then visiting safer parts of Mexico by flying there might be an idea to consider. If you speak some French, Montréal is an absolutely gorgeous city that is personally my favorite city in Canada.

Once you get used to local travel, you can start branching out by traveling further away. Try to go somewhere safe with customs similar to yours. I highly recommend going to places where you can get by with the languages you know.

Good places for solo traveling outside of North America

Ultimately, the biggest factor in ensuring you’ll have a successful trip abroad is whether you can communicate there. Therefore, the ability to speak English in a foreign country with its inhabitants is more important than one might think.

Here are my personal recommendations:

• Europe
  • United Kingdom*
  • Ireland*
  • France
  • Germany
  • Belgium*
  • The Netherlands*
  • Austria
  • Switzerland*
  • Italy
  • Spain
  • Greece
  • Denmark*
  • Norway*
  • Sweden*
  • Finland*
• Asia
  • United Arab Emirates — Dubai*
  • Japan

Places starred in the above list with an asterisk either have English as an official language or the vast majority (>80%) of the population speaks English. In those places, it’s acceptable to assume you can talk with someone randomly and they will speak English.

I would suggest avoiding places where English or your other fluent languages are not widely spoken. For instance, while Turkey is a beautiful country, I had extreme difficulty communicating in the country, as I do not know any Turkish.

Group travel

Here, I will only talk about traveling with friends in a group. Traveling with your family is a very different story. The dynamic between your parents and siblings is going to be a totally different vibe than when you are with your friends. I’m not going to be addressing that in this article.

At first glance, group travel sounds like the best of both worlds: you get to explore the travel while you do it with your friends. Fun, right?

In reality, while the potential enjoyment of a group trip are high, there’s many hurdles you’ll have to clear to achieve it, both before and during the trip.

Pitfalls of planning group travel

The challenges start with the logistics of the trip.

1. First, your abilities and availabilities need to match and you need to agree on the same dates. While today’s more relaxed work from home culture may more easily facilitate workcation arrangements, it does not guarantee your friends will agree on the same dates. If your friend doesn’t have the same nationality as you, keep in mind that might limit your ability to travel internationally with them.
2. Second, your friends might not have the same budget as you. Want to fly business class but your friend can only afford economy? Stay in a hostel or a 4-star hotel? These tiny disagreements can add up and cause resentment among friends, as you’ll definitely be going in with an expectation of what quality you want for your trip.
3. Third, your friends might disagree on what exactly to do, where to go, or how to get there. Take the Shinkansen or fly on JAL? American Airlines to LaGuardia or United Airlines to Newark? Want to fly the early morning flight but your friend prefers the evening flight? Stay in Manhattan or Brooklyn? Compromises might not make everyone happy. These might not be dealbreakers, but the less you do together, arguably the group trip becomes less of a “true” group trip.
4. Fourth (and arguably the biggest pitfall): plans change, and depending on your friend’s personality, they may be more inclined to bail on your trip.

Making group travel feasible

To account for these pitfalls, here are my suggestions:

• Keep your group small (between 2 to 4 people). The more people you have in a group, the more unwieldy it gets to coordinate. The more cohesive your group is, the more enjoyable your experience (and your travelmates’ experience) will be.
• Try to only plan group trips that you’d be fine changing to a solo trip in a worst case scenario. Don’t get disappointed when your friends cancel on you. Life happens, and some people aren’t as committed as others. Believe me, this has happened to me more often than you might think. If you can’t salvage a trip by yourself, you need to be either able to take the trip alone or be prepared to cancel.
• In case you need to cancel or change plans, book refundable plane tickets and hotel reservations whenever possible. By refundable, I mean fully refundable to cash, not to flight credits issued for future travel on the airline. Avoid booking basic economy fares. Hotel reservations that are refundable tend to also allow cancelation within a few days of the check-in date. Flexibility is key when dealing with multiple uncontrollable factors. (Sometimes, the price difference is too unreasonable to justify fully refundable tickets. In that case, book the next best option and/or use your best judgment.)
• Preferably go with friends whom you are close with. This is my advice as someone who is a mild introvert. Traveling together means you will be with the same person or people for extended periods of time, and for consecutive days. If you won’t enjoy each other’s company, your trip might become unbearable and your experience might be hampered.
• If you must go with not-so-close friends, do trial runs with them before traveling. I’m not a loner, but traveling with unfamiliar people could drain my social battery and test my patience. Are you really ready to test your patience with someone whom you haven’t gotten a chance to know well? To resolve this, test the waters out by taking a day trip with them. In my opinion, just being able to stand them isn’t enough. Preferably, you should truly enjoy your company with them, almost to the point where you’d be sad to end the trip with them.
• Make sure you are all on the same page on what to do. This refers to two different things: one, everyone knows what responsibilities they have for the trip, and two, everyone agrees on the itinerary.
  • Friends should divvy up trip responsibilities. Who’s going to reserve seats at the Michelin-starred restaurant? Don’t let one person do all of the planning. They will be overworked and the others might not even enjoy the decisions they make as a consequence of being the sole planner.
  • The itinerary should be agreed upon ahead of time before departing. Depending on the dynamic you have with your travelmates, you can change the itinerary once you embark on the trip. However, going without any concrete plans might result in some quabbles that could make the trip challenging to enjoy. If you have some disagreements about the itinerary during the planning, that’s okay. It’s not a dealbreaker! You can find days or times to split up and do your own activities for part of the trip.
• Try to find friends who are likely to commit. I say this even though all of my closest friends are less committed to trips than I am. While I love my friends, I can’t rely on them. I have to face the inevitable reality that they simply aren’t as able to hold to their travel plans as I am. It’s not because they are irresponsible, but because different people have different levels of interest and different situations in life.
• But also keep in mind it’s not always your friends’ fault if they ditch. Keep in mind cancelations occur for various reasons that are often beyond your friends’ control. If they get called back for jury duty or they have a family emergency, can you blame them?
• Have a conversation with your friend about their likelihood to commit to the plan. Sometimes, friends go along with a plan begrudgingly. I find it’s helpful to talk through the likelihood they will come and enjoy things. There’s no point in hiding true feelings—it’s better to be honest about the commitment to the trip and interest level you have about the trip. After all, don’t you want the trip to happen and for it to go smoothly?
• An open mind goes a long way. I think the people who are best suited to group travel are the ones who can accept that everyone will have different ideas and if they’re open to accommodating different ideas from each person. Travelers who are happy to accommodate their travelmates’ must-dos are much more likely to have fun together with them. But if you aren’t open minded, you shouldn’t force yourself to be flexible at the expense of your satisfaction. Just know that your attitude probably doesn’t suit group travel. If you are genuinely bothered by the compromises and concessions you are making, then you probably need to either switch a group or go solo.
• Sleeping in the same room? Bedtime routines matter, and there’s nothing worse for your trip than disrupted sleep. If your roommate needs to perform prayers at night or in the early morning, make sure it won’t disrupt your sleep. If your roommate snores loudly, they should disclose that before rooming with you. Sometimes, earplugs might not even work.

To go solo or with a group?

Each option has its benefits and drawbacks, but I find both of them to be great for different reasons.

For exploring a new location, I tend to prefer solo travel. This gives me the chance to focus on exploring the place I’m visiting.

If you need to stick closely to a specific itinerary, going alone might be the better choice. When you must absolutely check out each and every place or activity on your list, there’s a good chance your tripmates won’t share the same enthusiasm. Rather than compromising, why not just go by yourself?

Sometimes, you need a trip to get away from it all. Perhaps you’ve been doing things with friends for many weeks consecutively and it’s getting tiring. In that case, it’s probably time to get some quality me-time. If social activities have burned you out, taking a solo trip for at least 5 days is one of the best ways to recover from it.

On the other hand, going solo can get lonely. Dealing with jetlag after you get off the plane is much easier when your friend is right by your side. If you find yourself needing company during your trips, or if you find yourself possibly getting lost in a foreign country if you go alone, it’s time to go with a group.

If you’ve been living life solo but you haven’t seen your friends in a while, a group trip might be just the right remedy. What better way to reconnect than to go somewhere together? This is what Hollywood movies are made of. The Hangover Parts I, II, and III all feature this theme. For South Asians, the famous Bollywood film Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara provides a quintessential look into a trip among a trio about to leave bachelor life by traveling in Spain.

For outdoor activities in the wilderness, I strongly recommend sticking with a group. While I have broken this rule before, all the times I’ve been with someone else made me much more confident that I’ll be okay even if I get hurt.

Also, if I can’t organize a trip with a group, I’m pretty much stuck with a solo trip. If fate tells me to take a solo trip and there are no safety concerns with doing so, I shall go forth and venture alone!

“Group solo travel”: the best of both worlds?

One idea that recently proliferated among my colleagues at Microsoft (who are in their twenties) is to take a trip together, but to split up during the day to do their own things and then meet at night. This way, they get the best of both worlds. During the day, they get the flexibility to do the activities they want, including their choice of lunch. At night, they still get to meet and socialize with their travelmates for dinner and other evening activities.

I find this idea very interesting and I would like to try it. The colleagues who participated in this hybrid travel arrangement said they really enjoyed it. They consider it a model that could be replicated in the future.

The one thing to note is, I don’t think this would work well with a tiny group. Imagine doing this for two people. How awkward would that be? Might as well both travel solo at that point.

Final thoughts

There is no right or wrong between choosing to travel solo versus in a group. I’d say the only thing that is certain is: if you can, you should try both. Each option gives you a different experience that’s cool in its own way.